KlaupaRaw!: February 2011

Yes. My dream actually, is to one day make myself into an immortal zombie. Well, it's better than being a freaking human. WHY?? here it is.

1. Food would be abundant.

let's say, one day you went for a walk outside and this is what you see

This is what a normal person sees.

not interesting at all. they are all humans that you call strangers, untouchable, delicate and with very touchy emotions. selfish, and greedy. Humans.

But, if you are a zombie, the case is different. the whole world turns int

eresting. AND, this will be how you see the world.

YESH. ALL THE HUMANS TURN INTO FOOD. THIS IS SO INTERESTING. No need to worry about what to eat anymore. No need to suffer anymore famine. Just open your freaking worm infested mouth and there you have it. FOOD. In this case, cannibals work too. But zombies are more awesome.

2. There will be no need to waste your time making up.

Yesh.

Humans, need to look good. In order for that to happen, they need to dress up and make-up. Well, some humans probably don't think it's important, but those who does, spent a lot of their time doing such. and the results are magnificent.

well, i think a lot of plastic surgery is needed too.

definitely need make-up.

But this a different case with zombies. why? here's why.

they make no difference before and after. notice i even gave them new clothes. they dirtied it anyways. =(. and I was mad. So I gave it new pants. But when I tried to put them on, I tried so hard, both it's legs broke. Oh and I didn't stop there. Cause I went on and put some make up on it, but it didn't have any effect. instead, some of it's skull came of. Opps. And. you can never differentiate a guy zombie with a girl one. They all look the same. No need sex change. No need plastic surgery. No need time. No need money. All this added up, = happiness.

3. No need to face books anymore.

This applies both ways. Face book or facebook. First. The face book problem. Humans need to read. Zombies doesn't. no reading? no books. no face book problem. Here's the example.

Human parent : Oh no boy. you better get into your room and start studying. Or else no computer games for you. especially no left for dead or resident evil. GO. NOW!

Human child : Yes ma. ( shows extremely sad face) I'll try to face my book from now to eternity.

Human parent : GOOOOOOOO NOWWWWWWWWW AND STOP TALKINGGGGGG (takes out cane)

Zombie parent : Heuy kips. bruans. (translated as : hey kid, brains?)

Zombie child : besh. (translated as : yes )

Zombie parent : goosh spoy. (translated as good boy)

See? being a zombie makes everyone happy.

Well, the facebook problem, you could already figure it out. Facebook can never be facebook when everyone has the same face.

yesh.

Everybody says being fat is no good at all. But I do not think so. Here's why.

1. You get extra food.

2. it's more worth it if you're buying cloths.

yes. but different amount of material. You get more material when you buy BIG SIZES.

Definitely more worth it.

3. it's easy to be the top of the food chain.

Well, how do I put this? You see, thin people are very good in their fashion. But fat people isn't. They just grab whatever fits them (not many choices) and put it on and goes out. So, being a stylish fat man, you get to be top of food chain (fashion wise). Another plus point. Nobody would judge you if your fashion sense went wrong. They'd just say 'Nah it looks weird because they're fat. '

4. It's maintenance free.

If you want to be slim, you need to do