My awesome cells.

You know, i think i'm so good, it's gone into my cells. I mean, my cells are so awesome. They're like the best ever on earth. You know why? Because they're my cells.

Proof:

There was this day. I was happily eating my very nice breakfast with my parents.

Yup. You can't see my sisters. They're still usually still pigging in their beds. Sometimes the big one do come. But that's when we go for roti planta. She loves them. I LOVE LOVE them too. It's like joy and love made into a piece of golden greatness. Anyways, while we were eating, my dad suddenly had this brilliant idea.

He said:

"Hey son, why don't you fix the pipes later? Which one? The one outside. It was leaking since last week."

I'm was totally caught in shock. It's like suddenly one day you see an angel and the angel told you: you're going to be a plumber. and fix pipes for all the rest of your life. And pipes are going to be your live. And on the last day of your life, you have to fix the pipe that has been leaking since last week outside of your house.

The ARE YOU SERIOUS! face.

No. It wasn't those times where he would laugh and say: " YOU SHOULD REALLY LOOK AT YOUR FACE LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!' moments. It was serious. and it was a command. GO DO PLUMBING.

And so, I accepted the fact to do it. like seriously. I was determined to get down and over with it.

So. i took the toolbox, got all the tools i needed and prepared to get down and dirty with the PIPE. I was like yeah it's just a piece of cake, or maybe two, well better if it's three cause seriously one is never enough.

GRRRR. PIPE. YOU'RE GOING DOWN.

Well, I started and found out the pipe was no shabby enemy.

And so, i started turning and turning and turning, and sticking and sticking and turning and turning and turning again. Oh well, that's really basically what I really needed to do. Think i'm lying? AHAH. That's the proof that you've never done plumbing before.

In a decade's time, i finally defeated the leaking pipe. The leaking pipe died and was burned to ashes, replaced by a pretty lovely fluffy goofy cutely placed golden pipe.

And it we lived happily ever after. NOT. OH NO.

THERE'S A CUT ON MY HAND! AND ALSO RUST ALL OVER IT.

a very artistic hand huh.

And that time, i thought i was going to die. There's a cut. And there's rust all over it. I'm going to get tetanus. I am going to die. before i get to eat macaroons. before my dog died. before i become famous. before I could get married.

And i started to feel dread. I think i'll become the saddest case ever on earth, dying because i gave up my life helping my family do plumbing. Sorrow grew and i knew i was breaking apart.

Of course i couldn't cry. I was a man. A man with a plumber pride. But at that time, my mom suddenly shouted:' HEY!!! are you done fixing the pipes???? I have something for you to eat~~~'

And that was it. I totally forgot about the hand and RUSHED to my mom. She baked a cake. A whole cake. Not a piece of cake. And I AM serious. I forgot about the wound until a few days later i sat down thinking how the universe is so big and I am so small even though i am so big and suddenly wondering how long i am going to live and finally came to a dread stop. WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HAND!?

And then i realized. I am still alive. Not shaking, not having tetanus. I must be some kind of immortal monkey who cannot be beaten down by sickness. And so i figured it must be my cells. and this should be what happened.

this is inside my skin.

they all look strong and friendly. like me.

When my hand got cut, this is what happened.

ugly and weak creatures trying to kill me. =(

yap. Thousands of stupid pathogens tried to invade me. This was when i thought i was a goner. I thought all hope has been lost because if you see it under a microscope, it looks like this.

notice. The black ones are the bad guys. The red ones or rather, one is the good guy. But, i think because of my awesomeness, the red cell became immortal.

He fought and fought. Killed and killed. And all the tetanus pathogens were filled with dread. How could one cell be so powerful?? Well in the end, victory was inevitable. It was fate. The red cell was fated to win. The undeniable fate of being the cells of mine is to fight and win.

Burp. Wow. =)

The Faber-castell story.

I still remember when i was small, i used to like drawing. And by drawing I mean REAL drawing, on paper, not using a trackpad. I would always bug my mom to buy the coolest 'Faber-castell' color pencils. Naturally, my mom would never simply buy me things that I want. It's about RM24 at that time. But really, that amount of money feels like RM100000000000000000000000. Or even more.

Well, it's not like my mom is those boring mums that limits their child's creativity, but she DO provide me with color pencils. Well, these color pencils are the compilation of the many color pencils collected from goodness knows where, with a lot of brands like luna (color pencils for lunatics), stabilo (for a stable hand when holding milo), and so many others. Some of them even have very interesting brand names like FIRE color pencils.

Yes. That box of color pencil (which is made from plastic and it's actually an empty ice-cream box) has all the brands of color pencils in the world, except FABER-CASTELL. It's like pouring salt on my deep deep wounds =(. Or in this case, putting fire color pencils into my wounds. =(( Double sadness.

But one day, I was determined to get it. It was decided deep down inside my heart. I WILL get it. And so when I finally get my chance to go pass a shop that sells Faber-Castell, I began a series of strategies. Aim? to get my Faber.

The first approach. The gentle persuasion.

Preparation needed : a cute face.

To make this a bit more effective, you have to put hope in your eyes. Gaze upon your mom like she is the god of everything and will then bless you with the faber-castell. Of course, the smile of joy and gratitude and love must be present. Never stop believing.

But it's kinda funny, this method almost never works. Especially when you put your life on the line for it.

Well, worry not. There's still plenty cards up my sleeve.

The next step. The annoyance.

This is the hardest part of all. It's like a battle between you and your mom.

This part starts when your mother says no.

She's not even going to give you any attention.

Well, this really pisses me off when i was young. Why? Because my mom would go through a mountain of cloths that look all the same rather than considering my life threatening issue at hand. (notice she picks up the shirt that is EXACTLY the same one she's wearing. )

And so, you keep asking.

Uh-oh. Boiling point reached. But this is all going according to plan. The boiling point is like a 50:50 kinda thing. When you annoy her pass her boiling point, she'll either go:

'OK FINE I'LL BUY FOR YOU SO SHUT UP AND STOP BEING AN ASS AND BEING SO ANNOYING. YOU'RE MAKING ME UNABLE TO DECIDE WHICH DRESS TO BUY' and fyi, she is still looking at the same shirt.

or:

'YOU BETTER SHUT UP OR ELSE YOU'RE GOING TO GET SOME SERIOUS LOVING FROM ME. YOU'RE SO NOISY EVERYBODY IS GOING TO THINK THAT YOU'RE A BAD BOY. SHAME ON YOU.'

which, the second outcome is not the desirable one. But nonetheless, i will not give up my life.

I have still the last strategy, but i'll leave it for next time.

Hello KL.

Yeah. I have been in Kl for quite some time now. But until now, I haven't been able to post anything interesting. If I were to write something, it might end up to be something like this. Today is friday and I woke up at 7AM and i still have school today but it's still so exciting and we we we so excited so i guess i should choose to sit in the front row in class. Rebecca Blackish.

BUT THEN, it's labour day I went back to Kuantan, and there it is, the MOST exciting event of the year. The VVIP ticket to MLTR's concert. (the best part is, it's free XD) special thanks to mrs Bruno.

Yeah! and went you look back, it kinda looks like this.

It was really mind blowing. haha.

Sadly, I won't be drawing them out cause that'll only degrade their awesomeness. But, well, my friends ( you know who you are) are going crazy over someone that came along and performed together in the band but was NOT in the band. His name was Mikkel Riber. He was awesome.

And now, I am having post concert syndromes. For example, randomly singing a MLTR song (even you don't know the lyrics, you hum) (or if you only know that line, you keep singing) even if you're in the toilet. Or suddenly downloaded the 19 love ballads from MLTR. Or protecting your ticket all the way from Kuantan back to KL just to show it off (YAY!). Or promising yourself that you're SO going to go to their next concert if there was a chance. Or writing this post all about MLTR on blogger. (at this time blogger said, Could not contact Blogger.com. Saving and publishing may fail. Retrying... , but I keep typing anyways because I need to).

MLTR. Me Love Them Rockers.

This is going to be one of the saddest post EVER.

Yeap. Because it's going to be goodbye again. =(

It's so sad, it feels like Japan Earthquake was a happy thing. =( The other thing is, sad post are so hard to write, it's like almost impossible.=( It's like putting an elephant through the hole of a needle or asking a Chihuahua to shut up. =( Either way, as the very awesome blogger that will become very famous soon, and also the very kind friend that is very kind and will never do bad things to his friends because he is so kind, will write a very kind post to his friends because he is kind. =(

Actually, this thing was supposed to be in a very meaningful, one and only limited edition, creative and superb card, but, i was too awesome to do th

at.=( INSTEAD, I drew this blog post right for all of you. =(

Well, that was what I planned to do. =( But we love trees. =( So i thought of drawing it here instead, to save our trees. =(

Hah. =( I have to remember that this is a very sad post. =(

=(

the church members =(

Hello and good bye.=( I know it's sad. =( I can't really say anything, just that please do remember to keep your heart close to God, never compromise and never give up in the service of the Lord. =( Serving the Lord alongside all of you proved to be a blessing, and also a memory that is captured in my mind like a photo. =( And now, all i could say is, thank you. =(

the higher ground people=(

Haha. =( Well, I really hope that you all would continue the bring the fire of God and spread it to the rest of Kuantan.=( I really think Higher Ground was made up of God's chosen people, to bring the good news to the rest. =( I know it's kinda cliche to say never give up, but it's the best I could come up with, and i really mean it.=( Haha. =( I guessed i wasn't really de factor of Higher Ground but I am glad I'm part of it. =( And proud of it too. =(

the recess revo people =(

Good morning. =( (well it's because we only met in the mornings) Hey. Thank you very much for continuing what me and yan wen started. =( We are really, really grateful about it. =( Last year, when we started, it was just some sort of small group that isn't even being noticed. =( But hey! Look at you all now! You're now something official in school! I really wanted to put a happy face here but i remembered this is a sad post so. =( Carry on the good work! We want to win the school for Jesus!

the school friends =(

the school friends. =( I guess it's almost a repost of the note I wrote, but still, it's another goodbye to many, many of you, so I would like to say again. =( Thank you for being a friend. They say a friend in need is a friend indeed. =( But all of you were my friends even i'm not in need. =( LOL. I don't even know if that was supposed to be a compliment or sarcasm. =( But this is what's my genuine wish for you all : HAHAHAHA. =( that's right. =( Keep that laughter in your mouth and you can do anything. =( You know your life will turn out awesome because you knew a guy named Daniel Cheng, and you will have nothing to worry about anymore. =(

ADVICE : You know, I can't wait finish writing this post. =( It's so sad, it's giving me goosebumps all over. =( I know whoever reads this post will use a lot of tissue papers, but you know, we LOVE trees. =( So instead of using tissues, please kindly use a handkerchief. or the shirt you are wearing. or your hand. or your dog. Just don't use trees. =(

In ending to this post, there's this song that I use every time I want to say goodbye. =( and also the lyrics. =( please and thank you to pay a little attention to them. =(

You'll be fine tomorrow
The sun will rise again
It's never easy to say goodbye
You know I'll always love you
You know I always will

Chorus:
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
My old friend (my old friend)
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
We've reached the end (we've reached the end)

I don't cry with sorrow, I cry with joy
The memories we made can't be destroyed
You know I won't forget you
You know I never could
And when I said I loved you
You know I meant for good

Chorus:
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
My old friend (my old friend)
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
We've reached the end (we've reached the end)

You know I'll always love you
Goodbye

Chorus: (2x's)

Why the world would be a better place if we turned into zombies.

Yes. My dream actually, is to one day make myself into an immortal zombie. Well, it's better than being a freaking human. WHY?? here it is.

1. Food would be abundant.

let's say, one day you went for a walk outside and this is what you see

This is what a normal person sees.

not interesting at all. they are all humans that you call strangers, untouchable, delicate and with very touchy emotions. selfish, and greedy. Humans.

But, if you are a zombie, the case is different. the whole world turns int

eresting. AND, this will be how you see the world.

YESH. ALL THE HUMANS TURN INTO FOOD. THIS IS SO INTERESTING. No need to worry about what to eat anymore. No need to suffer anymore famine. Just open your freaking worm infested mouth and there you have it. FOOD. In this case, cannibals work too. But zombies are more awesome.

2. There will be no need to waste your time making up.

Yesh.

Humans, need to look good. In order for that to happen, they need to dress up and make-up. Well, some humans probably don't think it's important, but those who does, spent a lot of their time doing such. and the results are magnificent.

well, i think a lot of plastic surgery is needed too.

definitely need make-up.

But this a different case with zombies. why? here's why.

they make no difference before and after. notice i even gave them new clothes. they dirtied it anyways. =(. and I was mad. So I gave it new pants. But when I tried to put them on, I tried so hard, both it's legs broke. Oh and I didn't stop there. Cause I went on and put some make up on it, but it didn't have any effect. instead, some of it's skull came of. Opps. And. you can never differentiate a guy zombie with a girl one. They all look the same. No need sex change. No need plastic surgery. No need time. No need money. All this added up, = happiness.

3. No need to face books anymore.

This applies both ways. Face book or facebook. First. The face book problem. Humans need to read. Zombies doesn't. no reading? no books. no face book problem. Here's the example.

Human parent : Oh no boy. you better get into your room and start studying. Or else no computer games for you. especially no left for dead or resident evil. GO. NOW!

Human child : Yes ma. ( shows extremely sad face) I'll try to face my book from now to eternity.

Human parent : GOOOOOOOO NOWWWWWWWWW AND STOP TALKINGGGGGG (takes out cane)

Zombie parent : Heuy kips. bruans. (translated as : hey kid, brains?)

Zombie child : besh. (translated as : yes )

Zombie parent : goosh spoy. (translated as good boy)

See? being a zombie makes everyone happy.

Well, the facebook problem, you could already figure it out. Facebook can never be facebook when everyone has the same face.

yesh.

Reasons to stay FAT.

Everybody says being fat is no good at all. But I do not think so. Here's why.

1. You get extra food.

2. it's more worth it if you're buying cloths.

yes. but different amount of material. You get more material when you buy BIG SIZES.

Definitely more worth it.

3. it's easy to be the top of the food chain.

Well, how do I put this? You see, thin people are very good in their fashion. But fat people isn't. They just grab whatever fits them (not many choices) and put it on and goes out. So, being a stylish fat man, you get to be top of food chain (fashion wise). Another plus point. Nobody would judge you if your fashion sense went wrong. They'd just say 'Nah it looks weird because they're fat. '

4. It's maintenance free.

If you want to be slim, you need to do

BUT, to be fat, just

notice he looks super happy in this pic. =)

5. You get to skip lots of unwanted, impossible exercises.

Well, being fat isn't that bad now is it?

So, get your ass up and start EATING!!!